BALANCE

I have been thinking and meditating about the elusive notion of seeking "balance" in life. Balance between work and pleasure, business and rest, family and work, caring for others and self care, the cares of this world and the Kingdom of God.

The more I meditate, the more I realize how little I've understood this principle. You see, I am beginning to realize that every time I strive to seek “balance”, I take my eyes from what I really should be striving to attain; unity of purpose with God.

Every time I rush into doing what I perceive to be good without bothering to see if the author and perfector of all things “good” actually sent me, I fail. I fail not because of what I am doing, but precisely because of what I am not doing. In like manner, when I burn out because of my lack of “balance” and go into self-imposed hibernation and energy depletion, it is again a consequence of what I am failing to do which is to seek His will and willingly surrender to it.

I am realizing that God hasn't called me to live a balanced life any more than He has called me to live a busy or leisurely one. He has called me to live a life of obedience, and in this obedience, lies balance. I'm learning that balance is a by-product of obedience because of the fact that HE knows me better than I know myself; my limitations, my motives, my abilities, my strengths and weaknesses all of which life teaches me daily when I bother to pay attention. He knows me better than I ever will, and is ever ready to provide guidance through His Word, friends, circumstances and even enemies. He knit me in my mother’s womb, and conceived me alongside the good works set aside for me to do before the beginning of time. These good-works will never lead me into “unbalance”.

The road to obedience is one of surrender, contemplation and willingness; first the surrender of my will, then the contemplation of His, and finally the willingness to obey. This supernatural transformation of self-will to His-will can only take place in daily time set aside to grow closer to God, time to listen to His instructions daily, more than that, moment by moment. It is in this constant communion where I receive "manna" just like Israel did in the desert. I first receive instruction and direction, then desire and willingness, and finally the ability, strength, and courage needed to obey. Most importantly, I receive His sustaining love. Thank you Lord for your Holy Spirit and please forgive the many times I've taken your presence for granted.

I know that I am a work in progress and that there is no condemnation to those that are in Christ Jesus. I also know that I am on my way to becoming the man He created me to be, but as I honestly look inside myself, I also know that my struggle for “balance” is nothing more than the struggle between my will and His will be done.

"Only those that believe obey and only those that obey believe”

Dietrich Bonhoeffer

#balance #surrender #obedience #transformation